Finding Joy in Snarkville

Oh, yes it is possible that I have spilled coffee this morning, not
once, but twice. IN.FRONT.OF.PEOPLE. I really now want to crawl into a
corner and die a little.

Here’s a list of the things I have learned at BlogHer:

1. I’m pleased to say that I can now add, “Met someone I admire and didn’t make an ass out of myself” to my list of accomplishments.  for this I’m thrilled.  I THINK that Mir may not think I’m an insane stalker, thus I have successfully licked her without drooling horribly.  My proof of this is that she walked over to me in a crowd just to be social and I didn’t ONCE gush — we talked about bargains.  It was WAY cool.  Proud of me?
2. How exactly is it possible that in a conference full of women, that I spend my time hanging out with a guy?  I’m serious, I thinking this is proof that I am not a girl.  No, I’m not growing a penis anytime soon, but I’m not like women in so many ways.
1. I am not wearing open toed shoes.  Nor am I wearing heels.
2. It is me and the lesbians here without make-up. 
3. I may have the smallest suitcase of any woman here.  And I only have one spare bag, and that is for my knitting.
4. I don’t think that muffins and coffee/juice makes a breakfast.  I need FOOD.
5. I am incapable of squealing and doing the air-hug fake kiss-kiss.  It makes me break out in hives.
3. Conversation boundaries do not exist here.  Last night I have talked to someone about religion, another about politics, several people about sex, and discussed openly the two women making out in the middle of the courtyard.  My inner prude is screaming.
4. While this hotel pretty much sucks and I hate so much of it, I want to take home the shower — the larger shower with a tiled seat in the corner and great water pressure.  It is the ONLY reason to ever come to this hotel again. 
5. It is possible to type on next to no sleep. 
6. People need to learn the vibrate function on their phones.

Ok, they are dimming the lights here, which means I’m going to lay across a few seats and nap.

This entry was posted on Saturday, July 29th, 2006 at 4:34 pm and is filed under The Queen. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.