Finding Joy in Snarkville

First, I know it has been like a day or so — which is totally not normal for me. However, I must admit that since BlogHer, my list of blog reading got too big and I am now forced to trim, lest I spend every waking hour reading and none writing or bathing — yes, we can debate later as to which is worse.

So, here’s the scoop in no order and in rough bullet points, because frankly, let’s face it, you all just love the Queen and her bullet points.

• Before we begin this list, I must share some basic history. The Queen does not bowl. She abors bowling. She is no good at it. She can not imagine spending an evening in a smoke filled alley wearing RENTED shoes. She thinks rolling a ball down a hard wood floor to knock over some pins that have done nothing wrong is a little odd. She is without mercy in her opinion that bowling is reserved for old men who drink too much beer and smoke too many cigars.
• Announcement: Prince and I are in the process of actually joining and organized group activity TOGETHER. Ok, everyone, please recover from the shock (because there is another shock coming). Breath in and out, folks. This is a hard one to deal with on so many levels. We all know that Prince and I don’t share well. We also have traditionally not enjoyed similar activities (I throw out there for examples, computer games: him, not me; Knitting: me, not him; Cars: more him than me; Reading: TOTALLY different kinds of books; Movies: me, not him.) So, thus the total shock when Prince asked if I’d join him in joining a bowling league (add to the shock the first point). Let me let that one sink in for a few — I’ll wait. Yes, I said bowling. Yes, like with the bad shoes and shirts. Yes, the thing people debate if it is a sport since you can drink beer while doing it. Ok, bowling — get over it folks — we have much to cover, we must move on.
• So, now, because of the announcement, I am in the process of hiring a sitter for Duke WEEKLY. Oh, yes, I said WEEKLY. I read all the time from other bloggers and random people that they have some sitter come in once a week for couples to do stuff together (probably more bowling leagues) or for single folks to get out of the house for a few hours. But I frankly thought it was all a myth. Seriously, how was that possible? Hire someone to watch the child on a SCHEDULE? Not just for special occasions? I’m still a little giddy when my sitter didn’t laugh at me when I called last night to ask. However, I’m waiting to hear if her parents agree to my crazy plan.
• The mother’s club had a BBQ last night, which much to the Prince’s shock wasn’t half bad. The biggest thing that happened was there was a music lady there with all sorts of instruments. Duke was handed at one point a violin and promptly put it under his chin and looked around for a bow. I’m 99.9% sure this is the first time he ever held a violin or even saw one in person. Now I have dreams of a concert violinist in the family. What is more likely is that he isn’t much like me and may be able to keep a beat and perhaps even play some instrument without everyone running from the room.
• Back to the bowling. Today, Prince will be putting in an order for a new ball for him (his current ball tears up his hands — we don’t think it was ever drilled right for his lefty nature) and a pair of shoes for me. Hey, if I’m going to bowl, I want fun cool shoes of my very own. (Please note: I’ve actually had shoes for years now, but guess what happens after you have a kid??? I need new shoes.) So, I’ve done my research and I’m going to get a new pair. Prince put his foot down that I was not allowed to buy the same exact rental shoes (complete with the word rental down the side). So, I’m thinking of these. I wonder at what point I get a shirt with my name on it? (Yes, I too have a ball — but I currently don’t need a new one. If I start improving I may look into a nicer ball, but for now mine works and doesn’t hurt.)
• So to sum up. The Queen may not be the biggest bowling fan out there; but she may be willing to admit that her original declaration of hate for the game was harsh. You may ask, if you feel so strongly why are you going to do this? Well, first, the place where we are going to be bowling is CLEAN. I mean VERY clean. There is no smoking; it is 6 lanes (so never crowded); it is actually bright and cheery inside; it is CLEAN. Did I mention clean? Like does not look like the last bottle of Mr. Clean was bought when the alley opened and it is still half full. This may actually be fun. We will be bowling (not on the same team as) with one of the father’s of one of my more favorite schoolmates of Duke. In fact, we think that Duke might be a little sweet on their little girl. And finally, there is a pair of new shoes. (I may have to knit myself a pair of fun bowling socks too.) In actuality, I’m rather thrilled with the plan. It mets so many points on the curve and I’ve been forced to admit that I may not hate bowling as much as I say — but if I’m in a crowded room with, like, PEOPLE, I reserve the right to announce that bowling isn’t a sport, it is icky on lots of levels, and isn’t something I’ll be doing EVERY Wednesday night until May.

So, there you have it. I’m sure somewhere bowling is a sport of kings and queens — and thus I must bowl. But more to the point, I’m doing something fun with the hubby. Our team is made up of people who have never played in this league before — but one guy is rather SERIOUS about his bowling. I just hope he isn’t too disappointed to have me on the team.

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 24th, 2006 at 12:50 pm and is filed under Prince, The Queen. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.