Join Me in Snarkville

When we were in Vegas, we had some graffic work done on the MINI. It was really fun to watch a good friend of ours work on the car, but mostly because he kept declaring that he had “mad skills, with two D’s and two Z’s”

So while at bowling this week, Prince reminds me of this joke which caused me to laugh and laugh — as if it were really all that funny. But the relaxing and laughing pushed me into have a good night again — which was good, because I had been tanking for a few weeks. (more…)

When I was a child, I had a stuffed Snoopy dog who was real.  His fur was loved off to bald bare spots.  His stuffing was squished from soft fluffy to rock hard.  His nose is no longer centered from multiple nose jobs.  His fur salty stiff with years of tears that he has soaked up.

He is a real dog.  Real as in the Velveteen Rabbit real.  He was loved into realness which is magical and wonderful and sweet and even sad.  But my Snoopy (who I might mention still lives today) has been a constant companion since about age 5. (more…)

Remember how I said on my night out I lost no money in the casino, because I was simply drinking my beer and hanging out and that was totally ok with me, because frankly my cheap beer was more fun than paying the slot machine in the casino to take my money? (more…)

The good news is that after Wednesday, this trip did get better.  Yes, I realize that the thought “it couldn’t get worse” would be everyone’s first thought, but I have to say, things are looking up.

Yesterday morning, Prince headed off to track to watch cars bump into each other — seriously, I thought the whole point was to not crash the cars, but it seems that some of the random people on the track didn’t get the memo.

I however, took Duke to a playground where they had the coolest slide EVER.  It was a slide made up of those rolling things from the conveyor belts.  I got SERIOUS speed going down the slide — and it was Duke’s favorite.  I made it to a few outlet shops and picked up some much needed jeans for the boy — in a proper size so that he no longer looks like he’s waiting for high tide.  (I will say this, I bought the jeans knowing the size smaller would be too short, but these just looked way too long.  I put them on him this morning and wouldn’t you know, they fit PERFECTLY.  Who said he was allowed to grow like this??)

Then we went to see the Lions at MGM Grand.  Duke rode the escalator.  Back to the hotel to pick-up a pooped Prince and off to a party.  The MINIs took over the strip at 9pm and then I dropped my boys off and headed off to to party for a bit.

Now, I’m old and getting older.  We sat down for a few drinks attempting to get away from the loudest, most horrible cover band ever (in a pseudo Irish pub, no less) and I have my one pint.  I sat watching guys getting drunker and drunker and I have to admit nothing was really funnier.

Oddest line of the night: “I’ll walk you to your car.”  “you don’t have to, I’m ok.” “Oh, no problem, I have to pee.” HUH?

Funniest line by a guy from Vegas: “I’ve learned the art of holding onto my liquids — after all, we have negative humidity here.”

Money lost in a casino: ZERO.  I drank my beer; trash talked with the boys; and drove my happy butt home.

Tonight is my night to bring Duke home to bed after dinner and send Prince off to party with the boys tonight and I shall get some much needed quiet time (read: sleep).  But, yes, things are looking better.  We have a trailer for the drive home and I fully expect it not to take us 14+ hours to go 9 hours — but I could be delusional.

…I don’t think I could stand anymore of this kind of fun.

Ok, today, Prince, Duke and I headed off to Vegas for a long weekend full of fun and car folks.  As I type, it is 12:0something AM on Thursday morning.  My Wednesday began at 6am and it just hasn’t stopped yet.  In the immortal words, this has been a no-good, rotten day.  And while Prince could not will himself to sleep fast enough, I’m still attempting to unwind and de-clentch from the events of the day — thus you get my (right, true, and proper) version first. (more…)

Last night, Duke was an eating MACHINE.  I’m serious if it was not nailed down he either ate it or asked to eat it.  (In case you are new, this is so not like him.)

So on our drive home from school last night, he says to me, “Mama, I like strawberries.” (more…)

A short essay, by the Queen.

I’m sure that this title alone will triple my search results, but still it is true, Martha Stewart is the bane of the existance to all woman, wives and mothers especially.

As a former subscriber to Martha Stewart Living and a believer in the “Martha Way,” I feel uniquely qualified to declare it all crap.

You see at one point in my life I dreamed in shades of sage green and white.  I saw racks of pans in my kitchen with purposes for each.  I made meals daily that were as pleasing to the eye as to the mouth.  But what I REALLY dreamed of was the cookies! (more…)

I’ve been too excited for the past 48 hours to talk, much less blog about what is going on in Snarkville.  Heck, it has been nearly impossible for me to focus on anything since I found out. (Self-centered much?  Who me?)

Ok, so, let’s begin with the beginning.  Nope, can’t — too excited.  I’m GOING TO PARIS!!!

Not only that, I’m going via a transatlantic cruise on the Queen Mary 2!  AND, I’m taking Eurostar (you know the train through the Chunnel) from London to Paris! AND I have a hotel in Paris (good to not be homeless)! AND I’m flying FIRST class back to the states!!

Ah, that feel good just to lay it all out there.  Boy, do I feel better, now.  Only I don’t, why?  Because of all the baking…huh, you say. (more…)

Oh my — things have been a whirl for the last 24 hours and I slept (in a house with heat and the windows closed) for 7 of those 24.  I seriously have no idea where the time goes some days, but yesterday found me eating lunch at 3pm (though I thought it was 2pm because I hadn’t — still haven’t — changed the clocks in my car).  So, since my to do list is longer than yesterday, I fear I must bring you snippets of the last 24 hours. (more…)

As far as I can remember, I prefer to sleep with the windows open.  I love the fresh air, the gentle noises, the smells of the outside while I sleep.  I also love that when it is actually possible to sleep with the windows open it isn’t ever too hot or too cold.

Since Prince and I’ve been married, we’ve had a huge difference of opinion over the openness of the windows.  You see one of our first apartments had a lovely view of a major highway, and the noise with the windows closed was horrible, so nope, never open.  Then we moved to the ‘country’ to a small community and I though SURELY I’d get the open windows I loved.  Oh, but NO, it seemed that the school bus came through too early or the geese swaked too loudly for Prince’s delicate ears.  (more…)