Join Me in Snarkville

In some families, major holidays are a time to gather together and enjoy each other.  Other families get to watch Uncle Joe get drunk and wonder how many fights they can have around the table.  And then there is the Royal Family.  We, not wanting to conform to an norms, try to add spice to our Thanksgiving in so many other special ways.  Allow me to review the PERFECT recipe for Thanksgiving:

Take 1 boy child and give him a fever from unknown origin for the two days prior to Thanksgiving.

Take one mother who has been taking care of boy child for two days and not let her prepare a single leftover for Thanksgiving.

Give the mother ONE shot at the grocery store after 5pm on Wednesday evening, without a list just to make things fun.

Decide at 2pm on Thanksgiving Day that we MUST go to Thanksgiving dinner NOW — but we are going out, because there is no way we possibly cook.

Get all the way through the meal and take first bite of the one food the mother has been craving for three days (pumpkin pie) only to have boy child throw up at the table.  (We are a delight, please invite us to your next meal.)  Add to our joy, no clean clothes and nothing really to clean him up.

Take boy child home and talk him into taking his first shower.  Watch a two day long marathon of Curious George.  Have leftover Chinese Food for dinner.

On Black Friday, decide that there is ONE thing you need from Target, take now low grade fever boy to Target with you (even though it is a present for him) because husband must work.  Find out that the item is the only item that Target is sold out of.  Go home and order online.

Get up Saturday morning, tired and cranky.  Run out to pick up bagels — because you refuse to make pancakes for the 5th morning in a row.

As of this typing, I’ve not made a single Thanksgiving item that I wanted to make — frankly, if I go to bed tonight without green bean casserole there will be a major meltdown.  I have a pumpkin pie to make — because after the puking, I couldn’t finish my pie.

Before you go feeling too bad for me, my family had the PERFECT Thanksgiving on the 11th with the Queen Mum and Dad — complete with green bean casserole, though sadly no pumpkin pie.

Do you know what season it is?

As heard in my car yesterday:

Duke: Mama, please open sunroof.

Me: No, Buddy, it is too cold outside.

Duke: Why?

Me: That’s just winter, it gets all cold outside.

Duke: It’s not winter, It’s Falling.

Me: Falling?

Duke: Yes, look, the leaves are falling from the trees, it is Falling, not Winter.

Now you know.

Yes, I’m back to the world of the blogging.  I’m sorry for leaving you a whole week with nothing, but since I barely got my bags packed I had no time to actually get the posts ready to go.  Problems with getting bags packed involved me being both the primary packer of useful stuff (Prince is going to have a cow here, but it is true.  I pack things like clothes, underwear, and such.  He packs power cords.  He can spend hours packing up a camera, where I spend less time making sure three people aren’t naked for a week.  In total fairness, he does pack his own toiletries — as my passive aggressive ways would require that I leave out something important like his razor if he didn’t) and being affected by the plague.  (what a run-on sentence, um, sorry.)

So, not only am I back in the blogging world, I’ve stopped coughing up a lung to return.  I also sound like a girl too — just saying that’s relatively new too.

Want to know where I’ve been? What I’ve done?  Why?  Me, too — when you figure it out, please share.  Since, it has been too long since I’ve been bonding with you, I have a list of stuff — just random stuff from the past week. (more…)

So, Duke has the adorable habit of climbing into bed with us in the morning as Prince is starting to get moving and I’m in total denial that the world is waking.  (Sidenote:  when I say “climb into bed with us” I really mean crawl over me pushing elbows and knees into me with rather sharp pains in the process — just so everyone knows how completely adorable this process is at 6am).  After he gets fairly settled, blanket laid flat, he gets an arm behind his head so he can watch the news with us, the talking begins.  Currently he is fascinated by the day of the week, he’ll ask “Is it …..?” And I will say “yes” or “no, it is ….”  Well, for some days he has special names for the days, like Waffle Wednesday or Muffin Monday (yes, it has to do with breakfast, your point?) so this morning, he wanted to know what Thursday was.  And I thought and I thought and I thought.  Once he was out of the door, it dawned on me — it should be “Learn Something Thursday”…so this is the list (shock, I know) of things I learned… (more…)

I’ve been composing a post in my head for a couple of days — which frankly isn’t the best place for it.  Well, I’m typically doing this composing as I’m falling to sleep, so does anyone want to hazard a guess if I remember much?  So, I thought today would be a tribute to all the things I’ve been meaning to tell you, I’ve forgotten, and perhaps, still don’t remember.  And, as if this is new, here’s a list… (more…)

There will be 1,000’s of posts today about candy crashes in the blogosphere.  Sorry to have to add one more to the mix — but this is SPECIAL — no really, stop looking at me like that.

Sidenote the first: I had a lunchtime event to go to, hence my Smart Ass costume (no, Beth no pocket protector involved, however in a stroke of genius, I added my son’s little bow tie and a yarny tail — happy?).  I won a prize!  Well, actually, I won an iPod shuffle (RED, thank you) and now the thoughts of what the heck to do with it occur.  We could give it to Duke, which seems like the right match of his iPod skills to machine, BUT the Queen Mum is joining us in the Mac world and I know she’d love an iPod, BUT the shuffle is really too small for her and while we have um, THREE iPod-hand-me-downs to choose from, I think my mother can have something better than another hand-me-down tech item or even a won shuffle, for that matter. (Holy run-on sentence, Batman!)

Sidenote the second: There are no Halloween photos of the boy this year.  I know, I know.  The problem is that this was the year he GOT it.  He was so excited to even think about getting the candy and wearing his costume that I could not hold him still for a photo.  We had to do everything NOW and there was no time for “Mama wants a photo.” (Alternatively, I suck as photo-documenting my son’s life — I prefer the former, k?)

Now for the story, finally… (more…)