There’s been an effort for a few years to celebrate love on Thursdays in the blog world.  It is such a nice thought since love is rarely the funny things that happen in our lives and blogs are far better when written about the angst and stupidity of normal life.  In fact, we can tend to turn our backs on the blogs where the life described is too perfect or too delightful.  But one day, a single day isn’t too much to remember that really the best parts of life are the love parts.

I don’t tend to write the weekly missive on love.  Mostly because I’ve become horrible at writing daily; but also because it is so easy to bog yourself down with the problems of daily life and wonder where the happy went.  So, when something truly amazing happens, I feel it must be shared.

Last Saturday, Prince and I were on a plane returning home from our vacation.  I settled into my seat to watch many, many movies.  I was as comfortable as I could get and dozed a little.  When I was served lunch, the flight attendant spilled my glass of white wine on me.  Fortunately, I had a blanket on me and that had most of the spill.

Later in the flight, I woke up for a doze with a headache.  Oh my the pain.  I thought it was the beginnings of a migraine, but wasn’t sure (it is called denial).  I got up and washed my face.  A quick look in the mirror and I was a new level of pale (the lack of lips was a bit scary).  I wandered back to my seat and looked at the time, 3 hours left in the flight.  Ok, I can make it, I think.  Quickly, I figured out that I felt better if I was leaning forward in my seat with pressure on my eyeballs.  Oh, yes, did I mention that my eyeballs felt like they were trying to escape?

Prince thought I might be hungry.  I thought I was lacking caffine, since I had not had my normal coffee that morning.  I sat and waited and hoped my head would not explode before we landed.  I wanted to cry with the pain, but seriously the very thought of a sniffle made me weak with pain.

The flight crew was amazing, they offered me some Tylenol.  About 45 minutes before the flight ended, I got the coldest cloth I’ve ever felt and boy did that help.  At that point I knew I had a migraine, I also knew that I had the stomach upset too.  In a moment of rare clarity, I grabbed the air sick bag from the back of the seat in front me and made it easier to grab.

We start to descend.  I hope that I can hold it together until the plane is on the ground.  I’m the type of person who hates to throw up.  I will lay still for days in an effort to keep it at bay.  I got to thinking about the last time I was sick.  I could not remember it.

We descended more, I grabbed the bag and proceeded to throw up.  When the retching slowed, Prince asked me quietly, “you ok?” “No. I need another bag.” He grabbed his air sick bag and took my full one while I continued.

By the time we were on the ground, I was done.  I was also in great need of getting rid of two bags of barf (remember I warned you).  At that point, I looked at my husband.  He sat there, a wee bit green around the gills, holding a bag of my puke.  He didn’t shutter or try to hand it back to me (it’s yours; YOU hold it).  He pushed the call button, tried to keep me calm, and told me it would all be ok.

That’s when I stopped.  I stopped and looked at him and realized that love is lots of pretty poems and beautiful flowers.  It can be love songs and dancing in the park.  It can be trips around the world and so much more.  But that kind of love is easy.  That’s the sunny day kind of love.  The love that is simple because it is easy to be happy when the world around you is happy.

Then there’s the hard side of love.  The side of love that is when you are bone tired, dreaming of being home in your own bed.  The part of love where you do the unthinkable — you spend 45 minutes holding the puke of your spouse without complaint.

Thanks Prince.  I love you too — next time I’ll try to say it with flowers, ok?

Without futher ado. Here is the short list of what I’m thankful for this year.

1. Prince. The single most frustrating man on the planet to me and yet I love him. Don’t ask, it is complicated, but let’s just note, I’m posting at 4:30am for a reason, a steal the covers, don’t lay still, and snoring reason, but that’s ok, I needed to get up to think about cooking anyway.
2. Duke. Seriously, how can you not be thankful for the little boy who is both a constant reminder of how awesome life is and how much you have to learn as a parent. In addition to being my biggest challenge, Duke is also a great joy. And seriously, other than his stinky, boy feet — he smells pretty good too (if you catch him post bath and not post school).
3. My family — I’d list them all, but then the list would be my family tree and not the various other things I’m thankful for. Of note is of course the Queen Mum and Dad. They are wealths of experience, advice, and reassurance. They give all three freely and without expectations that I’ll do it their way. In so many ways they still challenge me to grow into a woman of honor and strength.
4. My friends. When I think back over the last year, the mere 365 days that have just past, I see such rich friendships that have bloomed. It blows me away that so many of them put up with me (and I’m trying…seriously, I’m trying). While I could spend hours typing out how each of them is pretty and wonderful, I’ll call out three and the rest of you know who you are. Know that I feel blessed to have you in my life. Niki, one of my closest, though 3,000 miles away, has proven that she’s really as close as a phone call. Erin, my newest fiber friend and partner on the various fiber cruises, my only regret here is that I didn’t meet you when I was still in the Baltimore area. Mir, the one who thought this whole blog thing wasn’t nuts and encouraged me from the beginning, but also this amazing woman who is starting a new phase in her life soon.
5. My Knit Night Gang. While they firmly belong in number 5, I wanted to call them out special. I said last week, as I say often, Knit Night is my therapy. I love coming to laugh, chat, and occasionally eat chocolate. I have such respect for everyone there, we all come from different places and yet, we are all friends.
6. For the roof over my head, in all of its Frankenhouse goodness. In the same vein, I’m thankful that my cupboards are full and that I’m not facing the business end of a Hungry Man Turkey TV dinner today.
7. For the collective health of the family. I can not express in words how I go to bed every night with words of thanks for this. While we all get the routine colds and croup, we are a healthy bunch and this is good.
8. For milestones, for potty training, for red tennis shoes, for pancakes, for Red Bear, for Blanket, for Monkey, for Thomas, for Nemo, for portable DVD players. These are all things Duke has discovered and loved this past year and I’m thankful for each and every one of them. They bring him joy, which in turn makes me happy. Duke has discovered many, many things — but these currently top the list. I sit back and am thankful that Duke is growing and maturing into an amazing little boy.
9. For bowling. Yes, I’m thankful for finding something that Prince and I can do together, especially since it doesn’t involved a computer or have us IMing in the same house. I’m thrilled with the folks we bowl with because above all things they don’t take themselves too seriously.
10. Finally, as I wanted to try to keep this list to 10 things, I’m thankful to all of you who read me, comment, send encouraging notes. I never would have expected this when I began and love the responses I’ve gotten. This little endeaver was a whim at best — and is proving to me daily that whims can be good sometimes.

I can’t leave this list without offering my in print thanks to God for making every single one of the above possible. I believe without question it would be foolish and short sighted of me not to place the thanks in His hands.

Now, while I attempt to find the normal levels of snark, irony, and funny that I’m 90% sure I left here somewhere, I must also begin to think about cooking this year. Photos of the folly into food will soon follow, I’m sure. Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Enjoy your turkey.

When we bring a child into this world, we take on the roles of caregivers, teachers, and role-models.  In the beginning, we are forced to slow down our busy lives because this little lump of flesh needs our undivided attention for all of their needs.  We wipe butts, we feed, we wonder if there is not a better way of putting the food directly into the diaper — but we learn the “middle man” is important.  We comfort when needed and smell and kiss and hold.  As their head stops wobbling and they begin to sit up, we take on the role of teacher.  We give them things to look at, things to touch, things to explore.  And we give them words for all of those things.  We begin to narrate our own lives to help the little grow.  And yet, we are not at the speed of our former, babyless, life.  Everything is still slower and you learn to live in the moments.

The babies become toddlers and wander around to explore their world on two feet.  Now, we take on the role of protector.  We move breakables up or away; we cover corners of tables; we lock cabinets from curious fingers.  We still play, we still comfort, we still provide — but we take on new roles too.

As toddlers become steady on their feet and talk by themselves, they turn into children.  We now fully embrace that teaching role.  We have to share explainations of how things work, take them on adventures (even when the adventure may only be in the produce aisles), we teach them to begin to care for themselves.  We begin to allow them to take on roles of their own, give them “jobs” to do to encourage responsibility and excitement in their life.  We also now have the chance to slay monsters, drive the “bed/bus”, and run excitedly to the door when the garbage truck comes to watch.  We get to see everything from the eyes of someone just 3 feet tall.  Finally, we get to be a kid again too.  We play games and we mold the world to teach, excite, and encourage our children.

Just about 4 years ago, I never thought any of this was really part of parenting.  I think back to my childless self and wonder what planet was I living on.  I know that it is not possible to grasp all the things you become and do when you are a parent, when looking at two lines on a pregnancy test.  I think the enoromity of it all would be too great, too overwhleming, too hard to grasp.  Instead, I believe that we get those months in the beginning dealing with nothing more than the basics to sustain life just to help ground us for the years ahead.

So, without further ado.  Here’s my photo for Love Thursday:

Prince and Duke Exploring together.  Love is opening the world up to a child in manageable chunks, so both of you can handle it.

Happy Love Thursday.